M-A-R-C-O and Marco was his name-o

I will dedicate this blog post to my friend Jimmy who told me this was starting to become jupiter uninspired.

So everyone has their albatross, right?

I think it’s safe to say that mine is the automobile. Since I was a kid I’ve always had a fascination with cars. My favorite toys were my entire laundry basket full of Hot Wheels. Yes, Hot Wheels and only Hot Wheels, I would have never had Matchbox. I’ve always had very strict preferences and standards. My other favorites were my Transformers ‘cuz c’mon robots that became cars??? How frickin’ cool is that? I also had quite an affinity for my Olivia Newton John records, but that’s another post for another day.

I’m 29 years old and I’ve had 6 cars that I would consider mine. In high school, I drove my mom’s car, but I named her so I’m including her on my list. Her name was Tawanda Taurus. It’s more story than you care to hear about how she got her name, but all you need to know is that it is related to the “Fried Green Tomatoes” film and that when you hit the gas the front seat would detach from the floorboard and fly backwards. I’ve also had Corey Corsica, Hiram Hyundai, Francois Focus, Joshua Jetta and presently I drive Marco Murano.

I’ve never felt that any car I had was showy. I’ve certainly never thought that my car would impress anyone and I’ve never wanted it to. However, I’ve gone through a succession of cars and each one with their respective payments. I’ve always said, “when I pay off this one, I’ll be able to quit my job and go do what I really want to do”. However, due to ignorance on my part or poor craftsmanship on Ford’s part, I’ve yet to pay off any of them.

So, now I’m stuck with Marco. And don’t get me wrong, I like him. He’s a big, obnoxious SUV and I should have had to show proof of my family of 5 before they let me drive him off the lot, but I actually traded in Joshua to reduce my payments. But I’m still a long way from paying Marco off and I can’t help but resent him just a bit. He may have a sunroof for when it’s warm out and he may have heated seats for when it’s cold, but he is also a barrier to making me happier with life.

I had a frank conversation with a friend the other day who told me that the only thing that could possibly prevent me from going back to school was “how I’d keep paying for the car”. So, I’m afraid that without some breakthrough that I can’t forecast right now, I’m stuck where I am. I should at least get some Olivia on my iPod. I bet she’d sound great on Marco’s Bose speakers.