Maybe it’s wrong to say out loud, but Mammy is my favorite character from the movie “Gone With the Wind”. Scarlett’s too vein, Rhett’s kind of a dick, Ashley needs to grow a pair and good ol’ Mellie is just too angelic. Mammy is the voice of reason; always kind and caring, resourceful, and is rarely afraid to speak her mind. She’s one of those people you aspire to be, except for that whole not being counted as a person since you’re a slave part.
I mandated that we watch the movie a few nights back. The boyfriend had never seen it and I felt as a gay man, it’s one of those movies you have to watch. It ranks right up there with “Steel Magnolias”, “To Wong Foo” and anything with a “strong female lead” (what Netflix decided to characterize our tastes in cinema). One of the scenes I’m never able to shake is Mammy hanging her head out the window, yelling at Scarlet and saying, “It ain’t fittin’. It ain’t fittin’… ain’t fittin’” as the screen fades to black.
It’s been one of those lines that found its way into my vocabulary after I first saw the movie several years ago. Sometimes, a situation can only be summed up by sitting back in your chair with a sigh as an “It ain’t fittin’” slides out to indicate not only disapproval, but that some shit just ain’t right.
Having been recently laid up with a minor strain of plague, made worse by antibiotics that my respiratory system appreciated, while my digestive system rebelled like the county boys from Georgia at the start of the War, I’ve had plenty of time to think. Granted, some of that may have been through a Day/Nyquil induced fog, but I think I’ve hit on something that seems important.
While falling asleep the other night, the word “fit” popped into my head. Just that. “Fit”.
My fashion gay self instantly went to clothes. To all of the people I’ve helped shop for clothes over the years, the first thing I always preach is fit. Style has little to do with trend, and what’s “now”. Most of us really don’t have the time or the money to be too concerned about that. It’s fit that makes something really work. Shirt’s too big, you look dumpy, pants are too short, you’re gonna look stumpy. That’s just the basic rule of clothes and fashion. Fit comes first. So yeah, I get it. Fit’s something that’s important. (For any of you who feel too snarky, I’ll remind you that I make no claims to be able to dress myself).
But, I think I can expand on that. We’re in January, so of course people think about fitness. You want to be fit, right? I know I feel better when I’m physically fit. I can also tell you that I’m nowhere near that now. While I don’t want to make a “resolution” about it, it is something that I plan on being more aware of, mainly because some of my clothes don’t fit.
However, I’m thinking of expanding this “fit” idea a little further. Clearly, there are other areas of my life where things don’t fit. Relationships, career, money and any number of things aren’t fitting with my goals or just my desires. Some things just need a little tailoring, a little hemming, taking in, or letting out, but I’m also going to be mindful of the figurative dresses that I’ve been trying to turn into pants. The things that aren’t ever going to fit and need to be discarded or the things that just can’t be tailored.
That’s the journey that I plan on taking myself on this year. To be aware of where I am, what fits, what needs tailoring and what needs to go to the Goodwill. We all have that thing in the closet that we cling on to, just hoping that one day it’s going to magically fit. It’s time to let that go, right? So, here’s to a 2012 that ends with nothing that “ain’t fittin’”.
